Ode to How Much I Hate Winter
Granted, I live in St. George, Utah. As far as winter-time climates go, I couldn’t have it better. Here in my beloved St. George, I haven’t once been chilled to my inner core, haven’t had to entertain the thought of scraping my windshield even once, I mean — really. As far as Winter’s go, I have it good. And by good, I mean Real Good. By good, I mean, This Is Indeed The Place. In fact, I have it as good as I could possibly have it without living in an area even more saturated with Seniors. I haven't even worn a jacket today, I mean, really, we've had days here lately where it's down-right balmy. I'm serious.
But that won’t stop me from complaining, because I still hate Winter.
I hate the dryness. My hands get so dry that they crack and peel and just HURT. [And I have an OFFICE JOB.] And my skin gets dry too, dry and itchy. And I’m the Lotion Queen, really I am. But the itchiness!
Which leads to the static! The static everywhere! In my hair and my clothes (me being a staunch fabric-softener sheet user and everything) and it just makes me want to claw at things.
And everything dies! The trees are all bare and all the lawns are yellow and it’s very unfriendly-looking. The landscape becomes desolate and uninviting and just kind of depressing. All things green go away and you can see clear through the cemetery.
And then as a result of all this - all I can think of is Spring. And Summer. And pool time. And searing heat. And blooming things. And baseball being played and getting off of work with the sun still being up for a while ----
Oh that’s a BIG ONE. In Winter, I don’t even need to open my drapes because I it’s dark when I leave for work and it’s dark again when I return home. THAT is just irritating. And again - a bit depressing. A lot depressing if you let it.
And all the clothes!!!!! I'm not a nudist by any means but too many layers are involved in wintertime. The jackets and coats and sweaters and the socks!
Ok that’s all. I know it’s not an ode. I know it’s just me venting my Winter-hate and I know that I need to get a real problem, that I have no possible room to gripe. But that doesn’t stop me .
I feel better.
But that won’t stop me from complaining, because I still hate Winter.
I hate the dryness. My hands get so dry that they crack and peel and just HURT. [And I have an OFFICE JOB.] And my skin gets dry too, dry and itchy. And I’m the Lotion Queen, really I am. But the itchiness!
Which leads to the static! The static everywhere! In my hair and my clothes (me being a staunch fabric-softener sheet user and everything) and it just makes me want to claw at things.
And everything dies! The trees are all bare and all the lawns are yellow and it’s very unfriendly-looking. The landscape becomes desolate and uninviting and just kind of depressing. All things green go away and you can see clear through the cemetery.
And then as a result of all this - all I can think of is Spring. And Summer. And pool time. And searing heat. And blooming things. And baseball being played and getting off of work with the sun still being up for a while ----
Oh that’s a BIG ONE. In Winter, I don’t even need to open my drapes because I it’s dark when I leave for work and it’s dark again when I return home. THAT is just irritating. And again - a bit depressing. A lot depressing if you let it.
And all the clothes!!!!! I'm not a nudist by any means but too many layers are involved in wintertime. The jackets and coats and sweaters and the socks!
Ok that’s all. I know it’s not an ode. I know it’s just me venting my Winter-hate and I know that I need to get a real problem, that I have no possible room to gripe. But that doesn’t stop me .
I feel better.
posted by Colleen at 4:32 PM
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